New Years 2006 Songs

What Happened When Elizabeth I Was Magically Transported to the Present

Elizabeth the First
Fell in love with Fred Durst
And they had the worst

It was a little girl
Whose cradle was a burl
Of myr’le

Her name was Rowena Saxona Virginia-Durst
The First.

Abrasion Song

When you abrade me
I find it confusing
Because I don’t know what it means emotionally.

Tango Grille Song

Dear Los Angeles Times,
Why won’t you burn down this restaurant.
Thank you, my name is Andrew
and I don’t subscribe.

Armand Hammer Song

Baking soda is a Stalinist joke!
It wants to fix my fridge but my fridge ain’t broke!
My momma used it but that bitch was mistoke,
’Cause baking soda is a Stalinist joke!

I made a volcano with papier maché!
Corn starch and chicken wire and paint and some clay!
I needed lava, no, I needed la-vay!
But baking soda didn’t work.

Eddie Kohler